Alone

 Have you ever pondered how many alone's there are in life? I never had until recently. Living alone, in a pandemic, brings alone to the surface where your brain rolls it and rolls it around and attempts to sort it out.

Now, alone isn't all bad, or all good. It is a part of life. Some journeys can only be taken alone. Part of loving yourself can only be learned while alone. Alone is a blessing, and a challenge. Alone is comfortable sometimes, and a piercing ache other times.

Growing up feeling alone was uncomfortable, it was the absence of love and support. It was scary and nothing about it felt tolerable. It is a long journey to feel comfortable being alone. One must develop strength of self confidence, faith, and self care to be comfortably alone. Yet, we long for connection, so the comfort of being alone only goes so far. As it should.

There are so many alone's.....the peaceful alone of a new Mother feeding her precious infant. There is the alone of the elderly wondering what is left to life. There is the alone of the widow/widower at a wedding with other couples celebrating the sacrament of marriage. There is the alone of a painful period of growth. There is the alone of offering tough love to someone in transition. There is the alone of contentment, when all your needs are met and you pause in gratitude. The alone of a scary diagnosis. There is the alone of betrayal, and the alone of reflection. There is alone within relationships. And, alone without relationship. There is the alone of knowing you did the best you could and still life imploded. There is the alone that is a communion with nature. I like that one a lot.

So many alone's. So many opportunities to count blessings, look within, and extend grace to our solitary self. Alone is a process, and a promise. And....there is the truth that we are only as alone as we chose to be. 

Which part of alone do you find yourself in? Can I walk a tiny part of that path with you so you know you are not completely adrift and, you know..."alone"?  Can I share I've struggled with being alone, and fought with the reasons it happened? Can I own each day is a new alone. Happy alone, angry alone, lost alone. Comfortable alone, lonely alone and peaceful alone. We all have our alone, and we grow from it. May your alone's be as short as possible and as long as necessary. And...may you embrace the gifts that come from the process.