National Dog Day

Years ago - 1999 maybe? Life changed and the kids and I needed a big dose of unconditional love. For years I bought into the theory that "we" weren't home enough to have a dog. Here is the first lesson. Only you get to decide what works and doesn't work in your life. 

Next lesson, follow your bliss. I didn't know much about dogs back then. I knew puppies were cute. I now know puppies are work. I didn't know senior dogs bring a humbling sort of love, with gnarly faces and grateful hearts. I didn't know the satisfaction of doing pet therapy visits at the hospital. I didn't know fostering would bring 30+ dogs into my heart and home.

All I knew is a little yellow lab puppy named Abby seemed like a good way to go. So I jumped in with a hopeful heart. I was being led to a better life. That happens after a crises of some sort. If we are open to the pain and the path, good things come our way.

So on National Dog day I give thanks for Abby, Fancy, Mickey, Kobe, Mr. Hanky, Layla, Hobbs, Gunther, Max and Maxx. As well as Jackson, Buddy, Bo, Pete, Sidney, Sophie, Bailey, Jesse, Addy, Cooper, Wallace, Buck, Queenie, JR, Chucker, Lil Bit, Limon, Ryder, Stella, Gunner, Charlie, Cooper, and Lady. Dogs have been very very good to me.

Granted all these lovely pups have walked my path over the course of many years. Not all at once, lol. Because hoarding is frowned upon. In the course of helping with rescue dogs, I have been rescued myself. I have learned, there is always room for one more. Shit happens, as does dog shit. I move fastest when a dog sounds ready to vomit. Healing is a slow beautiful thing. Faith is as nourishing as a dog biscuits. And last but not least, they will always give me more than I can give them. Follow your bliss, the blessings will follow. Hopefully, thankfully, with four paws.

Logic and Emotion

I had a choice to make. I could see it logically. Logically, it was plain and simple. Eventually, I realized I had to wrestle through the emotional side of it. Emotions can weigh so heavy and muddy the water. You know it's muddy. It takes time to figure out why. Some muddy can be felt but not seen.

It boiled down to a situation of either holding on or of letting go. I don't know about you, but letting go takes so much energy. Letting go means I need to trust that my needs will be met even when what worked before changes. It means I have to believe I'm not being left alone. It means I need to be open to a new way to do things, even if, especially if, I loved the way they were done before. 

Emotionally I had to let go of one more piece of a life I loved. It wasn't the thing in question that mattered. It was the heart string that tied it all together. So when I saw the heart string unraveling I knew what muddied the water. And yes, I cried. For changes I never asked for. For decisions I had no say in. For knowing the logical thing to do even when emotionally it hurt to do so. There are many moments in life that fit that equation.

Letting go is hard no matter how you approach it. Emotions are hard until you feel and release them. Sometimes they are hard even after you do. That's ok. That's life. In a way it's progress. Something is released, so something new can enter. I don't know what the new is or how it will look......I just have to have faith in the process.