Good Times

I walked into the kitchen at work recently and the song Sweet Caroline was playing. It's one of those songs that requires group participation. I mean really, how can you not? Things you may already know about me. I'm an introvert. Groups are not my comfort zone. I am a terrible singer. Truly awful. You'd only know that because I told you, not because you'd actually heard me. Yet, there I was busting out in song. Not well, but with enough enthusiasm that others joined in. Thankfully others joined in. In the moment it was a pure camaraderie. It was joy. It was silliness. It was what "in the moment" should feel like.   

A person can go through life without feeling safe. Safe to express themselves, safe to be themselves, safe enough to know what feels right, safe enough to take a stand, to know what they like and what they don't. It's possible to feel mostly good about a situation and still not feel safe. Telling yourself it's good, that you're happy, that all is okay, when not all of it is. Talk about a major disconnect. 

I find myself in a place in life where I feel safe and centered. I feel that in my heart. Let me preface this by saying I've done a hell of a job being independent to the point of isolation. Not a win exactly. If nothing else, it's given me time to grow. I'm a pro at making do, doing without, and being okay with it.

Here is the lesson. I don't have to go without, all of my needs are being met. Maybe not exactly on my timetable, but they are met thanks to the big guy upstairs. I'm only as alone as I chose to be. Alone is not a punishment for things I did or didn't do. Alone can be entirely comfortable. Forgiveness is an inside job. Read that again. And here's a biggy - it's okay to let people be there for you. Just like it's okay to be a little silly and sing in public. Being good is not a requirement. Being open to it is.