Just Married

Don't get excited - I'm not making an announcement. And yet, in a way I am. Don't you love it when I'm cryptic?

Here is the deal, the first time you get engaged it quickly escalates into an event planning scenario. You wouldn't, for the most part, dream of getting married without the wedding. The "wedding" becomes the primary focus. The "marriage" goes along for the ride.

This time around, at least for me, in so many ways I am already "married" and the ceremony part whenever it happens is secondary. Mandatory, but secondary.

I'm certain I'm repeating myself, but if only brides invested as much energy into the relationship as the do preparing for the wedding. Oh yes, there should be a prep courses: Compromise 101, Budget Planning, Conflict Resolution, Constructive Criticism, Finding the Balance Between Couple Time and Me Time, Encouragement and Support, Humor in the State of Wedded Bliss, Chore Distribution, Building Faith and Faithfulness. Perhaps even continuing education classes: Keeping Things Spicy (may or may not be a cooking course!), Surviving Parenthood, Romance Building After Marriage, Understanding Man Humor, Understanding Mood Swings, What You Heard is Not What I Said. So many possibilities.

No doubt the wedding vendors, of whom I am one, are shuddering at what I've written. It's not about the dresses, the matching colors, shoes, gifts, decorations, cakes or any other of the 100's of details. Those are the icing on the cake. The key is building the right flavor of the cake....the rest will follow when you are just married.